About 500 years ago, or between 1995 & the end of 1996, I had dinner parties every Monday night. I called them Experimental Dinners because I was always experimenting with recipes. Most were great. Once or twice I ordered pizza.
I haven’t cooked regularly in a long time. It was March 2006, actually, when I stopped cooking. I eat a lot of cereal for dinner and frozen dinners. Honestly, some of them are pretty good. I go out to lunch pretty frequently too.
Really? I gotta knock it off. So I invited people over for dinner. Now, it’s been awhile since I cooked for anyone, so I chose the safest of people: my sister, her husband and the children. Y’all, it was *fun*. We had an amazing pork roast, thanks to my pal Andi (recipe tomorrow), mashed potatoes and corn and ice cream in waffle bowls for dessert. Yum.
Not that there weren’t pitfalls along the way. Remember the gas grill I finally got put together? Well, I went to buy a propane tank for it (which, btw, I was calling “the gas thingie” until my friend T told me yesterday, “Barbara! It’s a propane tank! Had *I* been there you would have gotten the right thing!) Which sort of gives away my point – I bought the wrong damned thing. The guy at the store told me to buy this little one, which is for, like a camping grill or something. I didn’t know it, though, until too late, so I broiled the damned porkloin. It was still fabulous. Also, I realized that I invited 4 people over and I only have 4 plates. Oops! I used a salad plate, no big deal. Also, I don’t have a dining room table so we ate in the living room.
Afterwards, my niece and nephew entertained us with silliness, we watched a DVD of “The Big Bang Theory” (which I can’t say enough that you people ALL should rent and watch the first episode of the first season. So freaking funny.)
By the way, if T were here, my window AC probably wouldn’t still be in the window. I am going to have to be a big girl and do it my dog gone self. Pester me about it, will you?
The Femme Fairy Godmother is the alterego of a Michigan femme who loves to give (mostly unsolicited) advice to everyone regardless of sexual orientation. Also, the FFG has an overwhelming urge to mother everyone. And by mother I mean tell you how to live your life.
Amber
September 28th, 2009 at 10:15 pm
*pesterpesterpesterpester*
LB_Boi
September 29th, 2009 at 2:33 am
Your window AC? Really? How big is it? I could knock it out in an hour I bet, including cleaning it, boxing it back up AND cleaning the window. But me a plane ticket and I’m on it.
Scintillectual
September 29th, 2009 at 6:36 am
You have to *clean* the air conditioner after you remove it? And when I put it in I sliced up my fingers. Until someone comes and rescues me, that damn thing is going to stay there until next summer!
FemmeFairyGodmother
September 29th, 2009 at 9:28 am
@scintillectual Clean it? Damn! Well, it ain’t happening today. Urgh.
FemmeFairyGodmother
September 29th, 2009 at 9:28 am
@LB_Boi Thanks, sugar sugar! You know I’ll buy you a plane ticket any time you want ot come and visit me. Just let me know when.
Andi
September 29th, 2009 at 11:00 am
That’s still a long way for 15 minutes LMAO!! Isn’t there a handy-man around or something? Perhaps your BIL? I mean, hello… you had a guy there for dinner and he couldn’t do it? WTF? I say leave the damn thing in the window, unless of course you get a draft or something… then I could possibly see taking it out due to cold temps. Wow, talk about rambling…
Jude
September 29th, 2009 at 5:11 pm
Try an AD in the paper for a Handy-Dyke, to work around your house, outside and inside
.
Vixen
September 29th, 2009 at 6:10 pm
Cereal and frozen dinners, huh? I’ve been sitting here trying to think if that is what I’d do were I single w/o my kids…. And I think I’ve decided that I like good food too much. I’d eventually break down and start cooking for myself. LOL
Girlfriend, you and I are *SO* on the same page when it comes to things…..like your grill and the ‘gas thingie’. Hehe…
Camlin
September 29th, 2009 at 6:55 pm
Cooking for myself is sometimes a challenge. I have a smaller-than-normal stomach. My six year old is either with her dad, or eating dinner at her day care provider’s house. But I like good food, and I love to cook, so I’ve learned to cook normal-sized portions and freeze them for days when I feel lazy.
Akki
September 30th, 2009 at 1:13 am
The AC may weigh in at 25 pounds, it’s not that big and it’s held in place with a cutting board under if for a shelf. Girl, I’ve seen you move some stuff around in your day. I would not recommend that you clean it, however, look at the gas thingy as a sign. I know that Jim would haul that out in a minute and show you how to clean it. Chances are the damned thing will end up on the porch until spring with a post it note on it that reads, “Clean this in the Spring.” This I know, if you were to pretend that fabulous bath products were on the other side of that AC and the only way to reach them was to remove the AC from the window, that thing would be tossed aside like a dinner roll. When you coming out?
Dawn
October 1st, 2009 at 4:45 pm
I may not be a lesbian, but not only have I been mistaken for one (thank goodness they didn’t think I was Baptist!), I have been mistaken for a butch lesbian! My husband was so pleased. Do I get honorary membership at the ffg blog? What if I dress in drag and dance the hula? Oh, wait, I already do. *sigh* What if I offer you the services of my husband? For the air conditioner, I mean.
Oh, by the way, does cherry chapstick count as makeup? I think it should, however I have been assured that it doesn’t. My husband said that putting on my chapstick does not make up for the fact that I smell like Anti-Monkey Butt body wash that I got from Tractor Supply Company. I figured that at the very least I didn’t smell like a monkey’s butt. That would be bad, right?